Happy F***ing Mother’s Day

Jackson’s school had a breakfast for Grandparent’s Day, Donuts for Dads in March, and this month it was Muffins for Moms. His grandparents couldn’t make it for their day and Scott was out of town when they had the day for Dads. So I made sure that I could make it to the special mother’s day.

I got all dressed up, hair and make-up done, and called out of work for the morning. Jackson and I were going to have a special day, mom and son! Sweet memories of Jackson’s Kindergarten Mother’s Day Tea were floating through my mind.

Well, this one wasn’t going to be so sweet. From the moment Jackson got out of bed, he was in a foul mood. I cheerfully reminded him of the special mother’s day muffins breakfast. He replied, “I don’t like muffins” so I told him I’d pack pop-tarts for him to eat instead. I finally got him out the door…honestly I’d rather have to dress a stubborn mule and an angry crocodile while blindfolded in the mornings.

So, we’re on our way. We walk into the cafeteria. Vases of flowers adorn all the tables, baskets of assorted muffins are everywhere, juice is flowing, coffee is brewing, and dads are serving. It was really nice. So we grabbed some juice and sat down. I tried to convince Jackson that he ate blueberry Eggo Muffin Tops and there were blueberry muffins…same thing. He didn’t buy it. So I offered the pop-tarts again. He sat there pouting the entire time…arms crossed and face scowled. I glanced around at all the other moms happily chatting it up and their angelic children so proud to have the chance to show off their moms. Then I looked back at Jackson, I was embarrassed and hurt.

I cut the date short. I said let’s go, got up, shoved half a muffin in my purse, downed my juice, and walked out. Jackson shuffled behind, still pouting. I dropped him off at daycare and headed to work.

Was I blowing this completely out of proportion? Is it normal for a grown woman to feel so hurt and heartbroken by the actions of an 8 year old? I started crying and called my mom. She says it’s totally normal. Phew! Follow-up with my best friend…she says it’s ok too. Phew!

I feel a little better now. Jackson and I are going to have a long talk tonight. There will be tears and I will feel guilty, but we’re still going to talk about how we need to think of other people’s feelings and that we sometimes have to do things we don’t want to do and sulking through it doesn’t cut it.

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